Joe Millionaire, Episode 3: We'll Always Have Paris

Posted on January 20, 2003

The charade continues as Evan Marriot and his five lady friends pack their bags and head to the City of Lights for some fun and frolic. What I want to know is: who is planning these dates, anyways? I do realize that these are not exactly the most sophisticated people in the world, but really! The Moulin Rouge, the restaurant at the Eiffel Tower, a bateau mouche? This is every tourist trap for the truly uninformed. The only date with a touch of originality was the tango lesson with a teacher who didn't speak a word of English. Still, somehow she got her point across; Evan and the lucky Sarah looked pretty good by the end of the lesson and the ice was broken. Alas, the other dates didn't go as well. With her usual complete lack of fashion sense, Mojo wore a black cocktail dress with a black felt fedora (!) to an evening at the Moulin Rouge, which has a Vegas-style floorshow for the busloads of tourists. Evan kept getting hit in the eye with the unwieldy headgear, prompting his aside to the camera "I just wish she'd get rid of that stupid hat!"

The stoic Evan finally showed a snarky side on his date with poor Zora. Convinced that the quiet but beautiful Zora was hiding a big secret, Evan grilled her about her background and family with a tenacity that would do a hungry Assistant D.A. proud. It turns out that Zora grew up in poverty and had a terrible family life; no wonder she refused to answer his questions on national television! Still, he must have found that reticence attractive: she's still on the menu for next week's shenanigans.

But the flame-haired Alison pretty much ruined her chances when she answered a curt "No" to Evan's question as to whether she thought they had made enough of a connection to continue to another date.

Somehow this show just isn't as fun as it used to be. It just seems kind of mean, really. On the other hand, anyone who signs up for one of these reality binges should expect to be humiliated in public, right? And we, the public, continue to tune in. Until the next craze comes along, at any rate.