Nick Offerman's Monologue at the Radio and TV Correspondents Dinner

Posted on June 14, 2014

Parks and Recreation' Nick Offerman was the featured speaker at the 70th annual Radio and Television Correspondents Dinner in Washington, D.C. Offerman's dry humor was on display for the event, which seemed to go over rather well. He thanked the organizers for inviting him to the town of Washington, D.C.: "Between Republicans and Democrats, this city has become a noxious stink hole, where very little gets down because of backstabbing, deceit and greed. Just want to thank all of you for allowing a Hollywood actor like myself feel welcome."

He also touched on current events, such as the Time Warner - Comcast merger: "According to the Supreme Court, corporations are now considered as people, which is great because it’s always been my dream to punch Time Warner in the face." Nick then gave a refresher course on the Bill of Rights, which he says has been misconstrued: "The 3rd amendment says that soldiers aren't allowed to come and sleep in your house if you don't want them to. I don't think there is a lot of confusion about this one. The 4th amendment we seem to have forgotten about altogether, did the NSA spill barbecue sauce on this one? It doesn't say "some unreasonable search and seizures." The 5th amendment is mostly for people to invoke on the second half of Law and Order." Take a look: