The Paris Review Imagines Drunk Texts From Famous Authors

Posted on July 6, 2012

Jessie Gaynor of The Paris Review did a hilarious series of cartoons about what drunk texts from famous authors might look like.

Here's a sample: John Cheever:

"The club car on the 6:32 has always seemed to me a pleaseant spotto drink seven glasses of gin. Nothing is serious, but I am throwing up in my hat. I am throwing up in my hat."

Gertrude Stein:

"I am wasted or have been drinking since 3 or have wasted since this drinking 3 or this 3 because this one 3 one wasted since drinking. Srsly, I'm messed up. Can you come get me?"

The texts by Emily Dickinson, Sappho, William Wordsworth and Dan Brown are also extremely funny.